I want to wake up and just realize it was a nightmare and he is gonna knock on my balcony door…I just wanna wake up..

It hurts the most not even get to have a decent goodbye... How could he? How could he hurt me so much…maybe I did the same… and I didn’t notice…

I don’t want to hate him. I don’t want to be angry at myself either that I am the one who killed everything gradually...when did he stop loving me? Did he ever love me?

I wasn’t ready for that and I didn’t see it coming…when I saw Meno’s message: “that ıs always easy tee, no acts or articles of love, no constitution... love is like before civilization.. anarchism, nothing to do about that... then in that case u`d better listen Pink Floyd’s two songs: final cut & nobody home..”.. he made me wonder.. yea he is right.. he is so fucking right..

I would have died without Azin… she saved me... oh my, she saved me.

I’ll be fine.. I’ll be fine keep saying that to myself.

FED UP

I am so stressed with this bloody paper. I have to finish it till 12th....

K:Hey, there is something about Iranian NY times..check it out: Tehran warns west against attack

T:There is always something about Iran on the news... the Midget won't give up the fucking nuke thingy!

I don't know what I am gonna do... it is getting too much..worries of losing "K"..not finishing this fucking master degree...not finding a job ( I had three hard core interviews with Philips..still no avail)..I am already short in money..have to do something.
Everyone is like "girl, don't go back to Iran" there is nothing left there..and I hate to hear those kinds of crap over and over..I fucking miss everything there...


Back to work...politics sucks..being me sucks...I hate Conferences that take a week long...

Nostalgia

Amsterdam is as gray as ever . I am so fucking empty inside.I am feeling like I am gonna lose the game again. I thought I could rely on what I found here …thinking of all the beautiful things I killed to get here…I am so dead tired of trying all over again...so hopeless…

Quick Update

Aren't Lebanese people making the very same mistake that Iranians made 27 years ago?
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Is USA really going to attack Iran?
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Will you sleep with any of these guys for 10 million dollars?
• The i.r.a.n.i.a.n Midget
• Kim Jong Il
• Hugo Chávez
• Muammar al-Qaddafi

Blog Tag - 5 things You Didn’t Know About Tee

Despite it being the equivalent of an e-mail chainletter - it’s a fun meme - and it’s a great way to get to know some folks of the web.

Anyway,I've been tagged ... in a virtual game of BLOG TAG (thanks ,Alireza)

So here is my list of five things you didn’t know about me.

5- When I was in Kindergarten, I always played with the boys because they were more fun than the girls. As a grown up, I still have a lot of guy friends
My childhood playmate was my older brother who loved to bombard my Barbie doll house with batteries and pretend it was Iran-Iraq War. (I really didn't care about that doll house thing just how his sense of destruction got our ass in trouble later, freaked me out!)

4- Streetlights have a tendency to turn off when I walk or drive underneath them. This happens at least twice a month.

3-I am a random kind of person who leads her life on no-plan plan. I believe the best conversation you can ever have is,with a stranger.

2- I start eating hysterically when I am overstressed.

1- My favorite quote is by Arthur C. Clarke: "Once is an accident; twice a coincidence; three times...a conspiracy."

0-I am a good LIAR!

I am woefully behind on my Bloglines, so I have no idea who has done this yet. If you have not been tagged and would like to be, then I tag you. Go!

Random Ramblings

It seems Iran is getting pretty arabized by its national media. I am so sick of these Arabic clips shown in Iran's National TV. Iran's official language is Farsi and there are some other ethnic groups speaking various languages but you can't find a single Kurdish or Azeri clip on air as much as you get to see these crappy clips that I don't understand a fucking word of them. Yea I am a redneck Turk!
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We'll be living the same shitti life like North Koreans in just less than 10 years. As a totally neutralized citizen, I don't want that nuclear thingy…..Biatch
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I am no expert in all the mess going on here but I can just sense it , we are in deep shit.
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Why don't they have a cute little picture of a hand with the middle finger up in blogger? I could use that a lot.
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It is more likely for you to get the job if you have bigger BOOBS (LIKE REALLY BIG). I ain't talking about hooters; it was a governmental corporation working mostly on public projects…Bunch of assholes…
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It is pathetic I know but I love my single bed even more now!
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I miss "M".
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Connecting the Dots

Finally the UN supported ceasefire came into effect between the Israel and Hezbollah.
Many just considered Israel's war on Lebanon as a warm up for the US's war on Iran.
Due to Hersh's latest article neo-cons in Bush administration are paving the road for air strikes on Iran's nuclear facilities very sooner than it was expected.

Israel the real winner of thirty three days of war on Lebanon stripped down the Hezbollah from its missiles, the only retaliation option of Iran in case of military action against its nuclear facilities

Iran's self imposed deadline to answer to the incentive package offered by the five permanent members of the UN Security Council plus Germany to close down its uranium enrichment program will be due by August 22.

Iran once branded as the Axis of Evil is performing a new war game in the southern Iran these days; it gives a clear clue about final response of the Iranian government to the UN resolution which is exactly what neo-cons in Bush admin are enthusiastically graving for.

Attacks on Iran will have its own disastrous consequences for security and stability in the region. The very same like Iraq, Iranian people will suffer the outcomes most.

So the stage is already set for the new play in the Middle East, what President George W. Bush, Fox News, and the Washington Times were saying about Iraq three years ago they are now saying about Iran. Meanwhile Iran's government seeks its survival at any cost disregarding what will happen to the hopeless people of this country.